“The cops were called, and I was kicked out of the place in handcuffs. “One night, while in ‘girl mode,’ I was out with a group of friends and was forcibly removed from the women’s restroom,” James told the writer. The backhanded compliment also dares to presume that the main reason a trans person strives to “pass” is solely for aesthetics or for praise when, in fact, a trans person’s desire to blend in with the cisgender population is often driven by far direr societal consequences.Īs trans activist Brynn Tannehill wrote for Slate, not passing - or blending, a preferred term meaning simply not being seen or known as transgender - is not an option for some transfolk whose need to “blend into the gender binary stems from personal safety, job security, family concerns and more.”Ī transgender man named James told Tannehill that a harrowing brush with police was the final straw in his decision to begin hormone-replacement therapy (HRT) in order to be able to blend in more. “Most people love compliments, whether they are transgender or not, but we should all be thoughtful about how words can be hurtful - intentionally or not.”Īs Heng-Lehtinen said, there are countless ways to exist as trans, and applauding someone for not “looking trans” diminishes the experiences of those who do not seek to conform to heteronormative beauty standards. “Saying that someone ‘doesn’t look trans’ as a compliment implies that ‘looking trans’ is wrong, or worse, that there is something wrong with being trans,” he explained. Rodrigo Heng-Lehtinen, the executive director for the National Center for Transgender Equality, told In The Know that the idea that there is “one way to ‘look’ trans” is damaging and also wildly misinformed, especially considering the sheer size of the trans community in America alone. The real number is suspected to be even higher, as fear of discrimination still prevents many trans people from disclosing their authentic selves. That number is double the previous and widely accepted estimate of 700,000 by the same institution. There are approximately 1.4 million transgender adults living in the United States alone, according to a 2016 analysis by the Williams Institute at the UCLA School of Law. (In The Know has reached out to Jamie Pandit for comment.) “Many feel forced to pass like I did in the past, and it’s not a way to live,” she explained. In the comments section of her video, Pandit continued to explain that it is a “misconception” that all trans people have the desire to be passing - that is, to present themselves in such a way that they may be perceived as cisgender, instead of the sex they were assigned at birth. This content is not available due to your privacy preferences.
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